So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
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