Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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