All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
false alarm. still invincible.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
