I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
