I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
