yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize
