I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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