I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
