everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
