Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize