Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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