OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
