I heard we made out
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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