In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
