His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
