so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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