We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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