"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize