wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
