as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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