well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
