Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
