Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
