He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I just want to make out with him forever
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize
