if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
