did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
