How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
home. puking in laundry basket.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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