Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
