Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
