So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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