I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
