I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
