So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
