you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
