batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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