he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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