I just pynch a tree in the face
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
