Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
