Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
