I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
