I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize