My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
My ass is underappreciated
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
