ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
