Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
