Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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