I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
