OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
