ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Can I color on your dick again?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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