I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
