Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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